The Life-Changing Power of Distancing Yourself from the Negative People

All of us, at some point in our life, have encountered Negative People. 

Anyone who drains your positive energy, and continuously makes you sad, angry, and depressed are the negative people in your life. These people could be either strangers or closed ones like friends and family.

There's a famous saying that goes by:

"A rotten potato spoils the whole bag"

You definitely do not wanna be a rotten potato nor the one to get spoiled. So how exactly do you deal with a negative person and continue living a positive life?

The answer is simple:

Distance yourself from Negativity.

Let me tell you a short story:

I grew up as an introvert. I always enjoyed my own company, kept every moment of happiness and sadness to myself, and most importantly I always avoided people. But, the person I was back then and the person I am today is completely different. Even though a part of me will always remain an introvert, today I am more outgoing, I reach out to a lot of people, I talk to them, I find myself congenial and this is a huge change in my life that I believe is a very positive change in me. 

But every time I question myself, “How did this change actually occur?” I get reminded of that one negative person and incident of my life. That person changed me for good and I can’t help but share it with everyone. 

When I was in school, I had this friend whom I actually called my best friend.  Now since I was an introvert, I only had one friend and that was her. I was less interested in people and never really cared who tried to reach out to me. We called ourselves best friends forever and everything was absolutely fine until when I found myself overly dependent upon her. 

If she cried, I cried as well. If she skipped classes I skipped my classes too. If she didn’t eat, then I didn’t eat as well. And why not? After all, I valued her the most. But later, the friendship between us reached that point, where we were becoming toxic to each other. You know sometimes things just don’t work out. This started creating problems with our friendship. Misunderstandings, arguments, and whatnot. After all the things that happened between us, she stopped talking to me. I just couldn't understand why. I gave her all my love, care, and attention without asking anything in return. But, now I was questioning myself and self-doubting.

However, I was a firm believer and I still do believe that if it really matters to you, then you should always give your 100% effort and that’s exactly what I did. I always forced conversation with her, tried to reach out to her in every way I could, asked sorry for things I didn’t even know if I ever did but it was never reciprocated. Then I knew, that our friendship was actually over. I really felt sad, because as an introvert I was never really interested in people and the only friend that I had was no more with me. The feeling was completely devastating. I really felt bad, felt lonely, I used to cry a lot, trust me, a lot. It even reached that point where I even started skipping meals and cried every time, I saw her. 

It was then, that I realized that I have lost something very precious and I have to get it back and that was 

“Myself”

Amid the chaos and sadness, one day, a group of friends reached out to me. They asked if I was alright and assured me that I can share everything with them. At first, I hesitated, but later I felt that the person for whom I was feeling sad doesn’t even care and the people whom I had always been ignoring reached out to me. That really hit me hard. One person got away from my life but many more who actually cared came into my life. Slowly, I tried to reach out to them more often, talked to more people, made more friends. I kind of explored that extraverted side within me. You know what, the interesting part came when I completely got over my so-called best friend. The feeling of letting go of that one toxic person was beyond happiness.  I never turned back again and completely closed that chapter of my life.

This is actually one of those many incidents in my life that taught me great lessons on how to never lose my precious time and effort on someone and something that doesn’t bring me joy. It was when I was at that stage of my life where I learned that how being overly dependent on someone gets down to my self-worth and self-respect. I realized that getting on my own knees, crying for my own hardship is 1000 times better than crying for someone who all it does is just tear me down. My friend taught me to always put myself first and then others. ALWAYS.

This brings me to say that, sometimes the people you think are precious to you are exactly the ones who surround you with negativity. These people only like to see you suffer and instead of letting them see you suffer, surround yourself with positivity, positive people someone who actually deserves your kindness and your effort. No matter how precious, if you feel that certain situation or a person is affecting your mental health and draining your energy, then, calmly let them go. Instead, work on yourself and create a better version of yourself. That's what I did.

You should also understand that every person in your life has to teach you some lessons. Some teach you the most valuable lesson for your life while some are just the hindrance to your valuable life. Instead of blaming yourself and self-doubting, remember that you always gave your best. And if it still doesn't work out, then its a message from the universe that somethings are just not meant to be.

 The key mantra is:

You should never feel sad about letting go of toxic people and situations from your life. After- all they are gone for your good, and for your betterment.

Always think and believe that they are giving you a chance to create a better version of yourself in the absence of their negativity.  I have had lost many friends, many people whom I truly admired, it’s kind of sad as well, but when I think about it, my life today is much better and happier without them. Every person taught me to live my life with dignity, with self-pride and zero guilt. 

If you have gone through or if you ever come across such negative situations and people, then calmly let it go. Just think of all the good things in your life and take a moment to thank each and every person who walked away, and who will walk away someday in the future. 

You’ll still be doing good and living well. 

Just love yourself. XO.

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